It’s funny how we’re almost always wrong about what we want. We build up this fantasy, we come up with a checklist. We think that if we manage to find that one person that checks every box, we’ll be set for life. And besides the whole issue of being more in love with the idea of being in love, than the actual person you’re with, there’s the finer issue of even knowing what you want.
How do you decide to move someone out of the friendship category? Do you suddenly realize, hey, this person fits the bill. This is what I’m looking for. This is what will make me happy. This is what I want. Or does it happen at the point of contact – the first time you meet a person.
Time and time again, people are proven to be wrong about what they want. That’s why couples breakup, why friends fall out, why people abandon their pets (yes, I know that kinda came out of nowhere, but it is relevant, somewhat).
And maybe it’s precisely because we think it’s what we want that we build it up; that we set ourselves up for disappointment. Maybe we’re not let down by the fact that this person we’re with isn’t what we wanted, but that what we wanted just wasn’t good enough, or wasn’t what we really needed.
Maybe that’s why romantic comedies always end up having best friends suddenly realize they’re madly in love with each other, even though neither of them thought the other person was the one they wanted.
Because the most unexpected collisions are the most exhilarating.